Today the Best Male Cook and I are celebrating our 31st wedding anniversary.
We were married on a hot September Labor Day weekend in Lexington, KY.
Warren is an incredible person and loving father. He owns an old New Braunfels grill of which he is a master (follow my Instagram stories @greenapron to see the holey-grill) and he brews “liquid bread” for all to enjoy.
The fact that we’re celebrating our anniversary doesn’t have a lot to do with cookbooks, specifically, but I do believe there are a few similarities between long-term, committed relationships, and writing and running a business. If you’ll humor me, I’ll expand a little bit.
When I married Warren I made a decision to be married and to stay married to him. I also made a pact with myself: to hold up my end of the bargain to take care of myself and provide for my own happiness. I’ve always known that Warren isn’t here to make me happy. That’s my job and completely within my power. His job is to be here for me to love. And he does that well as a steady, consistent presence in my life.
With my cookbooks, coaching clients, and business I decided to think the same way. I hold up my end of the bargain. In order to cook, be on my feet in a kitchen, write, and manage my business, I take care of myself physically and emotionally. I value health so that I can show up to cook, write, and coach every day. My books and my business aren’t here to make me happy. It’s my job to manage my thoughts and have fun all along the way so that ideas and inspiration and motivation flow and so that I have a happy life, and not wait for the perfect book, clients, or situation to make me happy. Then, the offshoot is that I can write and create and teach from that good-feeling place. In turn, my books help you and you, in turn, can share your value with the world you live in. That’s the awesome, rippling power of making clear decision to do something.
After I decided to be married, I committed to Warren and to the idea of being married. I’m not saying that it was always easy, but it’s certainly been possible. I looked to create the future I wanted. I found friends who are examples of committed relationships. We spent time with them and valued what they did to remain committed. This commitment shut the door on entertaining other options and wow, that freed up so much of my brain power to do other fun things.
In a similar fashion, with my cookbooks, coaching clients, and business, I am committed to them all as well. Once I sign a contract, I finish the book. When a client enrolls in coaching, I show up and stick with them as long as they are gaining benefit from the coaching relationship. I commit to …